Like a Dream to Me
by TheBitterAftertaste
Summary: If you could say goodbye, would you?


_**Like a Dream to Me.**_

**A/N: Hey folks- been a while since I updated any of my fictions, so I'm just doing a brief one shot to let you know I'm alive and to let you know good things are coming. Hope you enjoy! This is for Louise- who needs to get in line and suffer watching our croissant Vesper just like we all do! Also thought I'd dedicate this to EvaGreenWeb- I talk frequently about my exams and my degree yet none of you get to see what I can do! So this is for you four girls!**

The deep mist interlinked together and settled as a thick fog around the fields surrounding Skyfall, and though James hadn't been here in so long, he had not missed it. He rested himself against a long panel of wood, a shotgun propped up close against the wall that was easy to reach if he needed to use it. It had been a long couple of days, and he was exhausted whether he cared to admit such a thing or not. He had not slept and hadn't stopped moving prior to now, when he had decided to take watch in case anything happened during the night. He stared out at the emptiness that shielded his childhood home, and tried to pull something from his memory. Something…_anything_ that would bring a positive connotation to his homeland. But alas there was nothing.

What he did remember was being stood half a mile away from where he was sat right now, and staring down as the first load of Earth was dropped onto his Mother and Father's encased corpses, and he remembered sneaking out of his cubby hole at the early hours of the morning, only to get something to eat and rush back in, not wanting to be spotted by anyone. Coming back here was the only place he could think of, the only place he could focus.

The place was so quiet, and so rested that even he couldn't resist closing his eyes for a brief few moments. Then he heard it, _a child's cry._ He immediately rested his hand over his shotgun , aware of the sudden disturbance and stood up, his finger resting on the trigger. This was a trap, and he knew it. Silva had caused this. Cautiously, he walked up the wooden staircase, grimacing at each little creak, very aware that he could be playing right into his hands. The child's cry had disturbed him, and he wasn't quite sure why that sort of device had been used but he was damned if he wasn't going to find out.

Though James wasn't sure why, as he trekked up the stairs it seemed to get warmer, and at the top of the hallway there was a glow that seemed to settle him, despite the danger he could be facing right then and there. He heard a voice, a soft murmur as the cry of the child seemed to echo around the home. It didn't occur to him that nobody else had been disturbed in this house, and the dimmed lighting almost called out to him, making him want to move closer and closer to the light that tempted his every being.

When he finally reached the top of the stairs, he glanced over and heard a soft melodic tune playing where his room as a boy used to be. He hadn't even been in there since he returned and didn't think he would, but he automatically stepped back into the shadows as he saw the shadow of a figure cross the room. But the shadow didn't move aggressively or with insidious intent, it washed over the floorboards like a wave gently lapping against the sand, it soothed him. Fascinated by the puppeteer behind the shadow he stepped forward a little more, shuffling quietly until he was just at the door, and when he saw what was there everything stopped.

She stood there, her back facing the door, in all her stunning glory. _Vesper._ Her dark curls flowed down her back as she moved with a soft lullaby-like bounce in her step. She seemed to glow, like there was a light surrounding her, following her everywhere she moved. James's mouth went completely dry and he fought for breath after realising he hadn't taken one in over a minute. It felt like a knife had plunged through his heart, yet it also felt like he was walking on air at the same time. Everything hurt, yet everything felt resolved.

He looked on as he watched her bend down; and it was only then did he notice the room that she was standing in. It was beautiful. Painted in a deep blue with a white boarder horizontally framing the centre of the room, a crib took the back corner, a mobile hanging over the white glossed framework and playing a simple, soft melodic tune as stuffed sailing ships and sea creatures twirled in a rhythmic pattern. A rocking chair stood in the corner of the room, and he swallowed as soon as he saw it, because it was his Father's. It was the only thing that looked old, but it fitted into the room so well that he had to fight to keep tears springing from his eyes.

As she had settled the sleeping infant Vesper slowly turned around and looked up at him, and right there she had all the power. Her deep blue eyes were soft and loving as they settled into his piercing blue gaze, and a warm smile played across her lips. She was wearing a navy blue shirt that settled at the thigh and black trousers, to him she had never looked so beautiful, there was almost an ethereal quality about her. Time seemed to stand still as she walked over to him, in stunning radiance of course.

When she reached out and wrapped her arms around his neck James thought she would feel cold, like the corpse he had been ensured she was, yet she looked so real right then James couldn't help it. His bottom lip had trembled, and given away the emotion that he had held back since he had last seen her, lifeless on top of the roof. He cried. He cried like an infant who had lost their blanket, like a parent separated from their child, _like a man who had lost the love of his life._

She was there as he sobbed, her arms entwined around him as he buried his face in her neck, and the tears would not stop, each time he exhaled a sob he inhaled her scent afterwards, and she smelt just like she used to. Like vanilla, like lavender, all the beautiful things in the world that he had not taken notice of till she introduced them into his life.

Once he had no more tears left to soak into her shirt he slowly looked up at her, one of his rough, calloused hands stroking her cheek. She was there, with him right now, and she was everything.

"Do not shed anymore tears for me James, it breaks my heart," she whispered, her own hand reaching up and brushing away the last droplet he had allowed to fall.

"Why did you leave me?" He asked, and the sadness he felt quickly turned to anger, even though he couldn't convey it he could feel it.

"Because I would hurt you more if I stayed," she explained in a quiet, soothing voice. It was all that needed to be said and the two exchanged a silence for a few long moments. The quiet was disturbed by the whimpering of the child she had put down in the crib, and she released her hold on him, moving over to the infant's cot.

"I forgive you," he whispered finally, and that brought a tear to Vesper's eye, though it did not fall he could see the residue of it shining in her beautiful eyes as she reached down and picked up the gurgling new-born in her arms.

"I will be waiting for you, we both will," she told him in a loving tone.

He took a step forward to hold her, even for a few more precious seconds, and his child. He needed so many answers, he had so many questions.

"Vesper I-"

"Bond?"

The room seemed to shatter around him as another woman spoke, the voice considerably older and pulling him back as he quickly spun around to see M stood, a confused expression on her face. When he looked back around she was gone, and so was the child, and the room with it. He instead stood in a dark, cold, damp room; that had paint peeling off the crumbling walls. There wasn't a light, not even a glimmer.

James automatically stood upright, trying not to show his devastation at the mirage that had so cruelly played a trick on him.

"I thought I heard something, the window had opened due to the wind." James excused quickly in his low, gruff voice. The crushing ache of his heart though was much colder than the wind though, as he walked over and closed the shutters that had opened. M simply narrowed her eyes and nodded, stepping back outside the room. She could tell she had interrupted him and it was clear he didn't want to speak of what had happened.

He was left alone, just as she had left him that day in Venice, gone without a trace, gone without a goodbye. It made him think and feel, whether being alive was worth missing her presence every single day. He stood in the room, unable to speak, unable to think. It was a few minutes before he glanced over to the corner of the room, and pursed his lips as he saw the rocking chair in the corner of the room. He cautiously approached it and brushed his hand along the dark wooden frame, before crouching and taking a seat, glancing at the spot where Vesper had stood with their child.

Whatever had happened, whatever was said.

_I forgive you Vesper._

**A/N: Well I just wanted to depress you all for the weekend :') I hope you liked it please leave a comment!**


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